UK life is full of people’s ‘journeys’. From X-Factor hopefuls to weepy award winners; we’re asked to share our progress from incompetent novice to barnstorming success. Within leadership, telling that tale can be tough, especially when you’re still navigating through a maze of choices and gingerly selecting the right way forward.
I’m not someone who set out with a clear professional goal in mind, I just thought the world should be better. The tell-tale signs were always there: aged 11 petitioning the local Bishop for better gender equality in the Catholic Church, School Chairperson of the Justice and Peace Committee, teenage anti-death row campaigner – basically, a professional do-gooder.
For some, leadership feels more comfortable than not; you look behind you and find others following your lead. For me, the realisation that there was great responsibility in leading others caused my enthusiasm to diminish and made me doubt my own motivations.
Several weary professional coaches and expensive leadership courses later I realised something important: leadership is laughably easy as a plucky individual. Your vision is unimpeded and your mission is clear. However, for real systemic change, you need others to join your quest. Lofty ambitions and a brave heart are admirable qualities but not enough to encourage folk to storm the castle gates alongside you.
I’m now a CEO. I never set out to be a CEO. I had a fixed idea in my brain of what a CEO did and who they were. They certainly didn’t look or sound like me. I look and sound like a committed community activist. That’s how others saw me and I realised that was how I saw myself. It wasn’t that I lacked the confidence or ambition to become a CEO, I simply wasn’t interested. For me, success was measured by the change you can see, rather than the strategic long-term leadership of a team. I wanted to be an ethical, authentic, dynamic social change pioneer – none of those words chimed with the role of CEO.
I wrestled with this and redefined what I want the role of CEO to be and ensured that all those traditional CEO functions that I struggle with are capably covered by others. I started to recruit differently; sometimes looking outside the sector, finding new voices that harmonised but also some that confidently challenged my own. I told people when I felt out of my depth or when I felt vulnerable. I realised that even social change leaders are human and need other humans around them for support, guidance and a gentle nudge to stay focused.
I started to lead carefully. Not with hesitation but with the sure-footed delicacy required to navigate a route through the complexities of voluntary sector life, ensuring the best outcomes for the young people we work with and the avoidance of unnecessary drama. I took a forensic interest in the impact measurement of our charity and in all the ‘dull’ things that I’d once studiously ignored. People began to talk about our organisation, RECLAIM, rather than Ruth.
Leadership now feels very different. I am not the loudest voice in the room or the first one onstage. I’m usually the one sitting proudly amongst a group of fellow dynamic social change pioneers, marvelling at all that we have achieved.
Ruth Ibegbuna (pictured) is the Founder and CEO of RECLAIM, a youth leadership and social change charity based in Manchester. Prior to this, she was a teacher at a state school in South Manchester. She is a Clore Social Leadership Fellow and an Ashoka UK Fellow. She is the author of 'On Youth', a book profiling the lives of five Manchester young people.
RECLAIM is a Pilotlight Partner Charity.
